Finding Keys in Quarantine #3:
Choosing to ELOPE
Over the past few weeks, I have been sharing some insights that I have been learning from my time in quarantine that might resonate with others. Most of these insights have always been in me, however, like finally finding lost keys when you have been looking for ages, it is only when you slow down that you see that they are, and have always been, right in front of you.
Last week I described the energy disruptions that I was experiencing and the resulting ‘mind storm’ that was clouding my effectiveness, concentration, decision making and relationships.
I shared my Energy Exploration Exercise (EEE) which has helped me recognize and track the energy shifts that I was experiencing. Through this process, I deepened both my awareness and reactions to these shifts and started to see the patterns.
I experienced one of these energy surges this week when I sent this blog in for peer review from my partners. One of my partners sent a short note back suggesting that we should post it and that they expected some people wouldn’t like it. Fortunately, in the moment I recognized that I had the ability to choose what to do with this energy and how to channel it toward a more positive response. It became quite clear that it was time to ELOPE.
Over the past number of years, I have noticed a number of couples who have chosen to escape the stress and energy spikes of a bigger formal wedding ceremony and instead choose to elope. By removing the stress of complicated expectations and having a more intimate ceremony, they then return refreshed and released to often enjoy a celebratory party with a broader community.
Running Away vs Shifting Towards
Interestingly Merriam-Webster changed the language of the definition of elope from ‘running away’ to ‘shifting towards’. I love that change and having witnessed both scenarios it got me thinking that this is a similar pathway that has enabled me to connect with and channel my energy to a more positive use and impact.
I also recognize that this decision is something that we ‘choose’ to do. It was with the power of that conviction that I realized it was definitely time to ELOPE:
The Five Core Components of ELOPE
- E > Recognize and name the Energy shift (verbalizing the positive or negative, often related to an emotion helps deepen the pause) – in the case of the above-mentioned partner feedback it was annoyance and anger
- L > Experience it through the eyes of Love, gratitude, mercy and compassion (accept and acknowledge the ‘gift in the moment’, human instincts are built to react, and these reactions inform us) – shifting to love I recognized that my partner has always been supportive and I have learned much from their past advice
- O > Through the eyes of love we enable Openness, curiousity and wonder (investigate, consider what is the gift or learning) – the love & gratitude allowed me to become curious as to what they may have been trying to say
- P > In this state of openness we are able to be Present and able to tap into our deeper wisdom (a clearer head helps us see our desires, feelings, memories and experiences) – with a heighted level of openness I was more present and able to fully tap into deeper insights and experiences within me
- E > When we are truly present we can more fully Engage and connect (with a clearer and deeper view we see alternative channels for the energy) – the deeper insights helped me see a pathway forward, including setting up a call to seek to understand
Learning and choosing to ELOPE, like most things, takes practice, and with practice, I have found it has significantly strengthened my ability to gain greater control over the energy shifts. This has not only helped my own effectiveness; it has also helped in my relationships as I’m not deflecting the energy onto those around me.
In the case of this blog, the resulting dialogue with my partner not only strengthen my writing it deepened our level of trust through my sharing how I leveraged ELOPE.
In my next blog, I’ll share some additional tools and insights within each step that I have found helpful in accelerating the flow from energy to engage.
Until next time, keep safe and if you have discovered other keys within quarantine send me an email at email@example.com so that we can help each other as we go through this unique and turbulent period.