“The meeting of two individuals is like the contact of two chemical substances, if there is a reaction, both are transformed”

C. J. Jung

Over the past 30 years, I have had the opportunity to work with amazing people in some incredible companies. As I reflect on my work and personal experiences I believe the most essential ingredient to success and fulfillment in each of these areas is how we connect and participate in the ‘in-between’. Jung’s quote resonates with me and makes me reflect on what kind of reaction and transformation that I wish to contribute to. We have all experienced interactions that have led to significant personal and team advancement as well as those that have set us back. Although we can’t control every outcome, how we show up to those moments and how we respond within them will directly impact how we are transformed.

Important insights to enhance the positive outcome of the ‘in-between’ include:

  1. Before the connection – whether the connect is planned or unplanned we all have the opportunity to pause and enter the ‘in-between’ with positive intent. The likelihood of successful impact is significantly increased if you first take two minutes to consider and capture your thoughts around these two questions:
    • What is the best outcome I hope for myself and the other person in this meeting?
    • How do I need to ‘be’ (mindset & behaviours) to increase the likelihood of that outcome?
  2. During the connection – even with positive intent, we can easily be distracted and in some cases run into conflicting opinions/experiences. Three approaches that have been helpful for me are to choose to be:
    • Present (i.e. shutting down technology; listen from the other person’s perspective)
    • Curious, especially when your first reaction is to disagree (i.e. Seek first to understand)
    • Courageous – be courageous enough to ‘speak what’s true for you’ when necessary
  3. Post the connection – be grateful, reflect & learn and be accountable for your commitments

A final observation of leaders who are masters of the ‘in-between’ is that they are self-aware and have a continual desire to deepen their understanding of themselves and others. Leadership tools such as EQi 2.0, FIRO-B, Kolbe A index and the enneagram all provide powerful personal insights to help maximize both the positive reaction and transformation.

To better understand how to put these insights into action or to access the suggested tools, please contact Lighthouse NINE Group.

Greg Smith
Lighthouse NINE Group
One Eva Road, Suite 209 | Etobicoke, ON M9C 4Z5
Office: 289-834-3963

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